Paradox
New member
- Joined
- May 29, 2006
- Messages
- 2,268
- Reaction score
- 314
Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest 2007: Mountains, hiking, and equipment
From
http://www.sjsu.edu/depts/english/2007.htm
An international literary parody contest, the competition honors the memory of Victorian novelist Edward George Earl Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873). The goal of the contest is childishly simple: entrants are challenged to submit bad opening sentences to imaginary novels. ...Bulwer-Lytton opened his novel Paul Clifford (1830) with the immortal words: "It was a dark and stormy night.
Winner: Children's Literature
Danny, the little Grizzly cub, frolicked in the tall grass on this sunny Spring morning, his mother keeping a watchful eye as she chewed on a piece of a hiker they had encountered the day before.
Dave McKenzie
Federal Way, WA
Runner-Up
Mary had a little lamb; its fleece was Polartec 200 (thanks to gene splicing, a diet of force-fed petrochemical supplements, and regular dips in an advanced surface fusion polymer), which had the fortunate side effect of rendering it inedible, unlike that other Mary's organic lamb which misbehaved at school and wound up in a lovely Moroccan stew with dried apricots and couscous.
Julie Jensen
Lodi, CA
Dishonorable Mentions
Marilyn's main feature was her mountainous breasts, with an associated sharp ravine of cleavage--the breasts not awesome like Everest, but like one of the Highland peaks near Balquhidder, where the notorious outlaw Rob Roy spent his last days.
John O'Byrne
Dublin, Ireland
From
http://www.sjsu.edu/depts/english/2007.htm
An international literary parody contest, the competition honors the memory of Victorian novelist Edward George Earl Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873). The goal of the contest is childishly simple: entrants are challenged to submit bad opening sentences to imaginary novels. ...Bulwer-Lytton opened his novel Paul Clifford (1830) with the immortal words: "It was a dark and stormy night.
Winner: Children's Literature
Danny, the little Grizzly cub, frolicked in the tall grass on this sunny Spring morning, his mother keeping a watchful eye as she chewed on a piece of a hiker they had encountered the day before.
Dave McKenzie
Federal Way, WA
Runner-Up
Mary had a little lamb; its fleece was Polartec 200 (thanks to gene splicing, a diet of force-fed petrochemical supplements, and regular dips in an advanced surface fusion polymer), which had the fortunate side effect of rendering it inedible, unlike that other Mary's organic lamb which misbehaved at school and wound up in a lovely Moroccan stew with dried apricots and couscous.
Julie Jensen
Lodi, CA
Dishonorable Mentions
Marilyn's main feature was her mountainous breasts, with an associated sharp ravine of cleavage--the breasts not awesome like Everest, but like one of the Highland peaks near Balquhidder, where the notorious outlaw Rob Roy spent his last days.
John O'Byrne
Dublin, Ireland
Last edited:
