Amantio
New member
“Hi, Honey. How was the climb?”
“Oh, man, what a day! Absolutely perfect conditions for Moosilauke. Hit the trail by 9:15 after messing up getting out of here this morning. Oh, by the way, sorry about waking you back up looking for the hat. I almost didn’t need it. I bare booted almost the whole way up. Trail was a frozen sidewalk. The pitch was pretty moderate most of the way, but relentless. I went up something called the Glencliff Trail to the Carriage Road. It’s all part of the AT, but it wasn’t very well marked, especially towards the top. Anyway, as well traveled as it has been, you couldn’t miss it.”
“Was it cold at all?”
“No way. Maybe twenty-two at the trailhead, but I was takin’ off my jacket within 20 minutes, and it never went back on, even at the summit. There was almost no wind up top, and the sun was just blazing.”
“See anybody?”
“Funny you should ask. I signed in at the trailhead kiosk, so I knew there were people ahead of me, but at my pace, I knew I wasn’t gonna overtake anyone on the climb up. I figured someone would eventually come up from behind me, but it never happened. I was thinking that this was going to be a replay of last week, and I would see no one all day, but that was preposterous. It was simply too nice a day. Eventually, about three-quarters of the way up, I bumped into a young guy comin’ down the other way, and he told me there were two groups of two ahead of me, so I felt a lot better. Anyway, I did see more folks. One guy (I think he was a Brit) warned me about the footing just below the summit of the main peak. He was right. Sheets of ice. So I eventually switched to crampons. I was alone on the summit for a while. I tried to take my own summit shot. I’m not optimistic about the outcome. We’ll see how it looks when it comes back. I wasn’t two hundred yards on my way back, though, when I saw a couple of groups heading up towards me, so I went back and dragooned some guy into taking a few shots of me. The next thing you know, people are coming up from all directions. It was a regular summit convention.
“I made one false move going back. I followed some skiers down the wrong trail for a while, but I realized after about three minutes that the South Peak should have been over my other shoulder going down, backtracked to the trail junction, and went the right way. But this is the best part. You’ll never guess who I saw coming up on the trail on my way down!”
“I don’t know. Brad Pitt?”
“No. Guess again!”
“Tensing Norgay?”
“Very funny. No. He’s quite dead. I saw LRiz! I was about two-third down, and I look up, and there she is with a couple of friends. Wow, it was great to see her! She comes bounding up, and I go stumbling down. What a nice surprise!”
“Who’s LRiz?”
“You know, she’s the young girl from that website I go on. The one who drinks all the Red Bull. She was on Field last weekend, but I missed her.”
“You mean the pretty one?”
“Yup. That’s the one.”
“So she was on the same mountain you were on last weekend, and she shows up on Moosilauke today?”
“Well yeah.”
“And there are how many New Hampshire 4000 foot mountains?”
“48.”
“And she just happens to show up on the two that you happen to be on two weekends in a row?”
“Well yeah.”
“So what’s up with that?”
“Well, isn’t it obvious? She’s smitten. She’s been stalking me.”
“Very funny, Buster! Just make sure it isn’t the other way around!”
“Why? What’s so funny? Some young women are into older married men. Can I help it?”
“Very older, very married, very short, very Italian men? Color me skeptical. Do you know what you look like out there? You look like a clown. Since you started wearing that shorts and tights combination, you look like a very short version of Michael Baryshnikov who got mugged by an AMC Trip Leader.”
“They’re not tights. They’re UnderArmor.”
“Whatever. Anyway, you stink, too. You smell like the Junior High boy’s locker room before the invention of Axe. I don’t find that very attractive, either. You’d better get in the shower and get those things in the wash, before you stink up the whole house.”
“OK, alright, already. Anyhow, it was a great day in the mountains. Next time you’ll have to come along.”
“Oh, I will. You can bet on it!”
“Oh, man, what a day! Absolutely perfect conditions for Moosilauke. Hit the trail by 9:15 after messing up getting out of here this morning. Oh, by the way, sorry about waking you back up looking for the hat. I almost didn’t need it. I bare booted almost the whole way up. Trail was a frozen sidewalk. The pitch was pretty moderate most of the way, but relentless. I went up something called the Glencliff Trail to the Carriage Road. It’s all part of the AT, but it wasn’t very well marked, especially towards the top. Anyway, as well traveled as it has been, you couldn’t miss it.”
“Was it cold at all?”
“No way. Maybe twenty-two at the trailhead, but I was takin’ off my jacket within 20 minutes, and it never went back on, even at the summit. There was almost no wind up top, and the sun was just blazing.”
“See anybody?”
“Funny you should ask. I signed in at the trailhead kiosk, so I knew there were people ahead of me, but at my pace, I knew I wasn’t gonna overtake anyone on the climb up. I figured someone would eventually come up from behind me, but it never happened. I was thinking that this was going to be a replay of last week, and I would see no one all day, but that was preposterous. It was simply too nice a day. Eventually, about three-quarters of the way up, I bumped into a young guy comin’ down the other way, and he told me there were two groups of two ahead of me, so I felt a lot better. Anyway, I did see more folks. One guy (I think he was a Brit) warned me about the footing just below the summit of the main peak. He was right. Sheets of ice. So I eventually switched to crampons. I was alone on the summit for a while. I tried to take my own summit shot. I’m not optimistic about the outcome. We’ll see how it looks when it comes back. I wasn’t two hundred yards on my way back, though, when I saw a couple of groups heading up towards me, so I went back and dragooned some guy into taking a few shots of me. The next thing you know, people are coming up from all directions. It was a regular summit convention.
“I made one false move going back. I followed some skiers down the wrong trail for a while, but I realized after about three minutes that the South Peak should have been over my other shoulder going down, backtracked to the trail junction, and went the right way. But this is the best part. You’ll never guess who I saw coming up on the trail on my way down!”
“I don’t know. Brad Pitt?”
“No. Guess again!”
“Tensing Norgay?”
“Very funny. No. He’s quite dead. I saw LRiz! I was about two-third down, and I look up, and there she is with a couple of friends. Wow, it was great to see her! She comes bounding up, and I go stumbling down. What a nice surprise!”
“Who’s LRiz?”
“You know, she’s the young girl from that website I go on. The one who drinks all the Red Bull. She was on Field last weekend, but I missed her.”
“You mean the pretty one?”
“Yup. That’s the one.”
“So she was on the same mountain you were on last weekend, and she shows up on Moosilauke today?”
“Well yeah.”
“And there are how many New Hampshire 4000 foot mountains?”
“48.”
“And she just happens to show up on the two that you happen to be on two weekends in a row?”
“Well yeah.”
“So what’s up with that?”
“Well, isn’t it obvious? She’s smitten. She’s been stalking me.”
“Very funny, Buster! Just make sure it isn’t the other way around!”
“Why? What’s so funny? Some young women are into older married men. Can I help it?”
“Very older, very married, very short, very Italian men? Color me skeptical. Do you know what you look like out there? You look like a clown. Since you started wearing that shorts and tights combination, you look like a very short version of Michael Baryshnikov who got mugged by an AMC Trip Leader.”
“They’re not tights. They’re UnderArmor.”
“Whatever. Anyway, you stink, too. You smell like the Junior High boy’s locker room before the invention of Axe. I don’t find that very attractive, either. You’d better get in the shower and get those things in the wash, before you stink up the whole house.”
“OK, alright, already. Anyhow, it was a great day in the mountains. Next time you’ll have to come along.”
“Oh, I will. You can bet on it!”