Stupid People

[KZKlimber]

They are not only in the high peaks...

While heading out for a short afternoon hike at a nature preserve not far from our home we encountered a very muddy trail with lots of exposed roots. Not unusual conditions but we were quite surprised to find a woman in bedroom slippers pushing a baby carriage. She had the good sense to turn around before the trail got steep.

 

[jbrown]

On the way back to Flowed Lands from doing Redfield, I and 2 friends ran into a girls basketball team with coaches from Quebec. They were lost, no map, improperly clothed, hardly any gear/food/water, getting on toward dusk, had hiked Marcy from the Loj that day, and were supposed to be heading back on Lake Arnold trail. They had passed the trail and were midway down to Lake Colden.

We led them the remainder of the way to Lake Colden, pointed them in the direction of Avalanche pass, made sure they had a few flashlights and bid them adieu. The coach's excuse for continuing on when he discovered back at Marcy Dam that he had left his map in the car? (In bad french accent) "I have done this twice!"

(This statement became a mantra for my friends and I. "I do not need to treat my water, I have drank this twice!" and such like...)

 

[adkleaddog]

The "road map" jarred the cobwebs....

I remember a bunch of years ago, we were driving down the dirt road towards Wilcox Lake to do some fishing, bouncing around in the truck when we came to a halt to see about 15 "kids" and what appeared to be a group leader walking up the road...they had the look of despair and exhaustion on their collective faces.
No packs, improperly dressed, no food, and a couple were carrying old soda bottles filled with water they no doubt found and filled from streams...we knew something was wrong.


Seeing that they were "inner-city" kids we just had to stop and ask where they were heading. The "group leader" said they were heading towards Hadley Mtn to climb it. That was the day before! After spending the night somewhere in the woods, they thought they would try to get to Hadley.....

I asked to see the map, and yes they produced one...a road map!


I just had to ask where they thought they were, and which way they were heading....(they had no compass either). The leader then pointed to a spot on the map that was about 10 miles away, in the opposite direction.

I pointed out where in fact they were on the "map", by the look on the faces of the kids, a mutiny, or worse, was about to occur. I gave them an old topo that I had, and asked if they would like a ride out..to Stony Creek to get some help.

Fifteen people, and 12 miles later in the back of the truck, they looked like a pile of puppies sleeping on a cold day. We let them out in Stony Creek, asked if we could contact someone, Mr. Leader then declared that they indeed were going to walk back towards Hadley on the county roads and "resume" their climb.....

They were from the "City"we were told, troubled kids getting out for adventure and "getting in touch" with themselves, and nature.

I still wonder to this day, if they made it to Hadley, or if the leader ever made it back to the big city!!!!

 

[sardog1]

When I was on Hurricane Ridge in Washington State back in ’84, I overheard a guy ask a ranger why was there snow on these mountains (the Olympics) when they were only such-and-such an elevation and you had to go to such-and-such higher an elevation to see snow in Colorado. The ranger just looked at him for a few seconds then replied, "Well, we're a lot further north here."

And a little farther north, on the Alaska State Ferry as we cruised past tidewater glaciers and snowfields in October. Tourist looks agog at the scene and asks a crew member, "Just how high above sea level are we?" After a judicious examination of the facts, the laconic answer:"About seven feet."

And back to WA: We were hauling out the remains of an unfortunate near Rainier. He had bushwhacked with tennis shoes and fallen at a place where falling was inexorably fatal. We didn't have a regular body bag, so he was tightly wrapped him in a plastic tarp that left just the soles of his feet protruding and then hauled out on a wheeled litter basket. I followed the litter team with several SAR dogs in tow. As we proceded down the trail, a tourist going the other way stopped me and asked, "Was he hurt badly?"

Finally, one from a Maine ecotourism operator that I heard interviewed on the radio. The camp specializes in moose watching excursions. Their favorite question from a guest? "Just how old does a deer have to get before it turns into a moose?"

 

[Grumpy]

An extended self-congratulatory moment after reading through this thread a bit ago segued into reflection on how I got to be so perfectly brilliant.

In the end, it dawned on me that my state of perfection was achieved, mostly, through having done an uncountable number of stupid things and having asked an untold number of stupid questions, or having made whole lot of stupid observations because I just didn’t know any better at the time. So my brilliance is not the result of native genius and superior instinct, after all. Drat!

Anybody else ever come to such a moment of revelation?

G.

 

[lumberzac]

Anybody else ever come to such a moment of revelation?

I have done many stupid things in the past. I’ll probable do many more in the future. But I have learned from all of my mistakes, and that is what is important.

 

[sardog1]

An extended self-congratulatory moment after reading through this thread a bit ago segued into reflection on how I got to be so perfectly brilliant.

In the end, it dawned on me that my state of perfection was achieved, mostly, through having done an uncountable number of stupid things and having asked an untold number of stupid questions, or having made whole lot of stupid observations because I just didn’t know any better at the time. So my brilliance is not the result of native genius and superior instinct, after all. Drat!

Anybody else ever come to such a moment of revelation?

G.

"rev-e-la-tion n.: 1. a revealing, or disclosing, of something. 2. something disclosed; disclosure; esp., a striking disclosure, as of something not previously known or realized. E.g., sardog1's postings on another board, here, and here, and here. Be sure to scroll down the thread as needed to find the revelations. Many self-deprecating examples from others may be found also on VFTT."

 

[Jaytrek57]

My mistakes (continuing) have been "learning experiences" and never "stupid". Perhaps funny, frustrating, time consuming and on occasion...injury prone/bordering on death....but NEVER stupid.

 

[Mad Townie]

Jaytrek, that's like never being lost, just occasionally being "turned around."

I thought about posting on this thread earlier, until I realized that the stupidest mistakes I could write about were all mine!

So, Grumpy, I enjoyed and appreciated your post. Luckily my stupid moves only threatened my comfort, never my safety.

 

[Nonlegit]

ive qualified just recently. I just got back from powder mountain utah, and when i was up there i was shredding some really steep moguls when i missed a turn. I glanced downhill and saw some crud (or "chowder", churned up powder for the uninformed) and decided that i would slow down down there (i was going fast because i just start blazing straight down through the moguls). Then i saw a green run cut into the side of the bowl, and a MASSIVE lip on the far end. I hit the paralell green run going breakneck speed, got aproxamatle 55 feet of air, and rolled 300 (yes that was from ski patrol) feet farther down the mountain. Fortunately i didnt break my back, as i landed rump first. I really didnt even get hurt, but i literally thought i was going to die.

Also, just about every hike ive ever done has qualified as stupid to everyone but a select few that hears about it ("MOUNTAINS!!! IN THE WINTER!!!...seek therapy...")

Some guy jumped out of the chair on a lift ride up over this awesome chute that was real hard to get to, and then fell through the chute. I was 2 chairs back, and then caught up with him at the bottom of the mountain. He broke his femur.

 

[Mad Townie]

Nonlegit, that reminds me of the famous famous last words:

Dude, watch this!

That line, or its equivalent, probably results in more stupid moves than anything else.

 

[BenW]

Speaking of stupid people met while building a cairn, trail work in general is a good place to watch stupid people.

While building bog bridges on the Cascade Brook Trail this summer with an AMC vol crew we were inundated with several groups of them (a.k.a. goofers).

We had extracted the rotted remnants of an ancient bog bridge from a mud pit about 20 feet long and about 2 feet deep on average. The five of us were covered solidly to the knees at least as well as beyond our elbows etc... One of these groups of goofers (this one about 40 middle school kids, sneaker clad etc. undoubtedly headed for Lonesone Lake) comes along. One of them asks us, "Is it deep?" "Not really." We're only covered beyond our knees. Farther down the line, one of them proceeds to walk along one of the stringers we have laid (precariously balanced - not for walking obviously) on the side of the trail, waiting until we need it. "Whoa---" flop. Then near the end of the line, one of them decides that this mud pit looks like solid ground...

Another day we met a group of khaki and polo shirt-clad high school boys huffing and puffing their way up the trail. We were all strung out along the trail carrying stringers (no pun intended) for the bridges. [man those are heavy and awkward] They asked me if I was carrying that board...

Goofers...

Later we started setting "Goofer traps."


Ben

 

[mink319]

Last year while XC skiing at Onteora Lake in the Catskills, there were some people ice fishing so I stopped to talk to them and the next day I decided to go ice fishing there.

When I first got there I was bringing my stuff out to the ice when I heard a car that sounded like it was stuck. The road to the lake was plowed, but the parking lot wasnt and had over 2 ft of snow. These people attempted to drive into the parking lot and park in 2 ft of snow, and to get out they ended shoveling almost half of the parking lot. Finally almost an hour later they got out, all that and they just left.
Later on while I was waiting for some fish to bite I was skiing around the lake when a family from the city on skis came up to me and asked me what I was doing. It was clear I was fishing because there was holes drilled in the ice with fishing poles and tip-ups over them, and one of them thought I was taking water test, so I just said oh yea, I do every weekend.
Later on after I left and was driving down the main road through town I saw them attempting to ski on the snowbanks on the side of the road because they didnt realize that this trail came out to a road and ended, and didnt think to turn back.
I get a kick out of stupid people as long as they dont get hurt or lost.

 

[Head]

Stupid people I can handle, I consider them to be Live Entertainment. AlpineSummit

Now thats FUNNY!
_________________

BirdHead Studios

 

[jrb]

http://www.freep.com/news/mich/sunk17_20040117.htm

 

[mushroomman]

Stupid things

I get a kick out the snowmobilers who spend 4 to 10 grand on a sled and take them out on the lakes to see how much open water they can cross. In Ma. when your sled or car goes in your responsible for getting it out, and the price can be huge plus fines. Gotta admit, it is fun to watch, but just seems really stupid to risk that much money!
Steveo

 

[TomEske]

I just learned that the title of stupid people does not only apply to "civilians". This morning while hiking I saw the familiar sign that reads "NO CAMPING WITHIN 150 FEET OF THE TRAIL". Posted immediately above it (on the same tree) was another sign which read "PLEASE STAY ON THE TRAIL". Maybe it was just my humor at the moment, but I stopped and took a photo.
Tom

 

[Trail Orphan]

While hiking up Treadway Mountain in NY a few summers ago, we came around a bend only to find a young woman naked from the waist down doing her "business" right in the middle of the trail!

 

[newcomb family]

gothics idiots

The first time I was hiking Gothics and Armstrong was October of '93. My friends and I were somewhat new to hiking and didn't have the gear for the hike. Regardless, we came asross some folks at the junction of the trails near the summit of both peaks to find them drinking booze from a bottle labled "wiskey", yes this is how it was spelled in black marker, on the side of their little red jug. They offered to share, but we gracefully declined.

 

[MonadnockVol]

Telling on myself

I am another hiker who attained his current dazzlingly high level of proficiency in the mountains by first making every mistake in the book. Fortunately I have survived (so far).

Here are three examples that come to mind:

1963 (8 years old): Mark and I take our first ever backpack along the AT in CT.

For food we bring canned veggies and a 5 lb. canned ham. We forgot to bring a can opener so the veggies were out. The ham had one of those little keys that you use to peel off a strip of metal all the way around the can, so that we could open. We ate about 2 pounds of the ham the first night and then realized we had no way to carry the rest. The ham was covered in a gelatinous goo and the edge of the can was razor sharp. A three day backpack turned into an overnighter.

1972 (17 years old): Our high school teacher, Mr. Riemer, took a bunch of us on a hike up Mt. Washington in November. There were several feet of snow on the trails and the legs of the cotton jeans we were wearing started to get wet. We made it to the alpine garden above the headway when a blizzard hit and we were in a whiteout. Mr. Riemer decided we should head for the autoroad and we started across the garden. A pair of college-aged hikers (who were properly equiped and knew what they were doing) were hiking about 30 yards below us and called up to us:

"Do you see any cairns up there?"

And my friend Chris called down, "Carrots? No, there aren't any carrots up here."

The two hikers looked at each other and called up, "Wait there!" They hiked up, looked us over and said, "You'd better come with us" and they took us down and out the Lion's Head Trail.

Chris went on to become an excellent rock climber and a member of an expedition to Annapurna (where they don't have any carrots either).

1975 (20 years old):

It's spring break and Jim, Deborah, & I are going on a backpack on the AT from Fontana Dam to Climgman's Dome. I've got my hiking stuff all laid out on my bed. Jim gets out of his last class and he's eager to go. He bursts into my room, shouts "Let's go, let's go" and starts grabbing my loose stuff and running out to the car with it, and throwing it in the trunk. The three of us get in the car and drive from RI to NC. We get out and I sort out the mess of my stuff that Jim threw in the trunk. That's when I discover that my sleeping bag was all ready to go and sitting on my bed in my dorm room back in Rhode Island. I hiked ten days in April with no bag.

It's amazing that I still have all my fingers and toes and most of my hair!