Taz and the porcupine
Years ago my ex-wife had a Jack Russel Terrier named "Taz." Taz liked everything that went on two legs and hated everything that went on four. She was really obnoxious. Although I have had bigger house cats, Taz thought she was the size of a Saint Bernard. She had that air of indomitable superiority that seems to be a mark of the breed. She used to attack my dog Buck who was a black lab, German Shepard mutt that weighed 110 pounds. Whenever he came into a room where my ex-wife was sitting Taz would attack him. Buck would give a long-suffering sigh and slowly lower his massive head, pinning Taz to the floor. Even pinned, she continued to snarl and try to attack until my ex pulled her out.
When I was working on my Catskill 3500 peaks, I took my wife, my son, and Taz along one Sunday. We got as far as the trail register and while I was signing us in, Taz found a porcupine and attacked it. And attacked. And attacked. The porcupine was acting like "What the f@ck? This dog is crazy" and lumbered off to a small tree and climbed the trunk with Taz still snapping at it. Up the trunk it went and then out along a small branch. Reaching the end of the branch it apparently thought that Taz had had time to reflect on the error of her ways and it dropped back to the ground whereupon Taz immediately attacked it again.
Needless to say, that was the end of the hike. Taz had over 200 quills in her including one THROUGH her tongue and one deep in her throat. She looked like a pin cushion or an old man with long whiskers. I cut a lot of the quills in half with my Swiss army knife (they're hollow and when you cut them they deflate a little making them easier to pull out) but I told my wife, "There's no way I can get the ones through her tongue and in her throat out. We need to find a vet."
Finding a vet in the Hudson Valley on a Sunday morning proved to be a bit of a challenge. I finally found one coming out of her clinic but she was just there to feed and check on the animals. When she saw Taz she agreed to help but said, "I'm going to have to use anesthesia and my assistant isn't here." I replied, "Well I've got a PhD in biology, can I be your assistant?"
That's how I got to see behind the curtain. Many vets - at least back then - used barbiturate anesthetics such as Nembutal. The problem with barbiturates is that they clear slowly and even with proper dosages, some animals die. And that's why vets tend to anesthetize on the "light" side. Nobody would understand if they brought "fluffy" into be spayed and the vet said "sorry the cat died."
They don't go so light that the animals feel anything but it does make them very responsive to stimuli. When the vet put the hemostat on the quill through Taz's tongue and pulled, Taz stood right up on the table. But as soon as it was out, she laid back down and closed her eyes.
I never took Taz hiking again. I don't want to be bringing a dog into the woods that is going to attack wildlife. It was too bad: when she was younger she hiked with me off leash a lot and never showed that behavior. But somewhere along the line she turned into the Charles Manson of dogs. We once took her to see her mother and two of her litter mates. Taz attacked them.
- MonadnockVol (aka Steve, Catskill 3500 Club #959)